Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Sticky notes and tassels

Noah wanted an iPod for his 9th birthday. While I was worried about two things – 1. He will be disappointed to receive such a physically small present as his only present, and 2. Is he prepared to be responsible for such a pricy gift? – We did it and he loved it. He did a great job taking care of it. In fact, the only scratch even on it was from something I did.
But as electronics go, he eventually wanted the newer version – the iPod Touch. We bought it for another holiday when he was 11. Unfortunately, on a Friday evening, he and his dad got home late and Noah changed into his pajamas half-asleep. The next morning, my husband did a load of laundry and Noah’s iPod touch was in the pocket of his jeans. The iPod was ruined. We tried rice, letting it air dry. Nothing worked. So my husband decided the fair thing to do to teach a lesson in responsibility was to have Noah pay half of the cost of a replacement iPod and he would pay the other half. So that’s what they did. Fast-forward a couple of months, and I did laundry, and when putting the clothes in the dryer, I saw the new iPod in the bottom of the washer. Ruined. We prayed over that iPod and everything. He ended up getting an iPad for Christmas a few months later, rather than the long list of Legos he had originally hoped for. (iPads are much larger than iPods and harder to miss going in the washer).
While my husband and I disagreed about whose responsibility it is to check the pockets before washing – the wearer of the pants or the laundry doers – I had a hard time remembering to check the pockets before dumping clothes into the washer, even after two traumatic laundering experiences. So I put a sticky-note with a big, black check-mark over the detergent hole to remind me of my responsibility before each load. It helped tremendously. I haven’t missed checking a load since.
For my Bible reading, I am in the book of Numbers. I was cruising through lots of rules and regulations and punishments, when in chapter 15, verses 32 through 36, I read about a guy who was gathering wood on the Sabbath day – a violation of the rules God had given them. God commanded Moses that this guy had to die for his blatant disregard for God’s commands.
Back to rules and such in verses 37 through 40, it says, “The Lord said to Moses, ‘Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘Throughout the generations to come you are to make tassels on the corners of your garments, with a blue cord on each tassel. You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the Lord, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by going after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes. Then you will remember to obey all my commands and will be consecrated to your God.”
The tassels for the Israelites were a kind of check-mark sticky note for the Israelites. These tassels (I kind of envision a Dolly Parton sort of fringe, though I think I’m way off on that one) were to remind them of the laws to obey, laws designed to guard their hearts, to keep them focused, to train them to control their actions, and especially to give honor and worship to God.
When an Israelite woke up and put on her ensemble for the day, she would see a tassel and remember to have reverence and respect for God and only God – no golden calves, no man-made idols. Her focus would be brought back to Him, perhaps leading her to remember how awesome He is. How He led her and her people out of Egypt, when without Him it would have been impossible. How she was once literal a slave, but now she is free. How He led her and her people by a cloud during the day and fire by night. How He gave her manna to keep her from being hungry.
When this Israelite lady would clean laundry during the day, she would see her tassel on her sleeve and remember God’s command saying she isn’t to covet her neighbor’s house. She would look around and see her own home, her own dishes, her bed, and be thankful for the comfort she has, thankful for a place to rest her head and be with her family.
Sometimes I get so wrapped up in big, time-consuming projects I get myself into, or so distracted by regular everyday routines that I could use a tassel. Or a sticky note. Something to remind me of what God wants from me. Something to remind me of what he has already done for me.
Some of these things happen naturally. When Noah makes me laugh, or gets his own ear-to-ear, wide-eyed, genuine smile, I naturally thank God for letting me be his mom, and naturally feel a renewed passion not to screw him up.
When I see a beautiful sunset – the kind with pinks and purples all mixed in - I instantly tell God, “Nice work!”
But in everyday things, how do I remind myself to not grumble when things don’t go my way? How do I remember to be thankful in all things? What about the days I’m feeling down on myself? How do I remind myself not to bring everyone around me down too? On days I’m doubting how God is going to make things work out, how do I remind myself of the many, many times He has been there for me, and the bunches of times He has been there for His people in every situation I read in my Bible?
I really don’t want to go with tassels. That’s kind of ‘80s-country and not my thing. But I need a plan. I’m thinking maybe sticky notes.

Maybe one on my mirror to remind me of how I can trust God, no matter what, like Psalm 9:10 “Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.”

Maybe one in my kitchen to remind me to be thankful - 1 Thessalonians 5:18In everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.”

For you, it could be something other than sticky notes. I heard a woman on the radio saying she talked to God about thinking about Him, and knowing He is thinking about her, when she sees a robin. Sounds kind of kooky, I know, and she admitted as much, but she said the experiences she has had with robins because of this have meant so much to her. Whatever works for you, just make a plan to remember.




I will start with my two sticky notes and hopefully add more. More promises, more reminders. Like the Israelites, I hope this plan will remind me of blessings, guard my heart, keep me focused and keep me thankful.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Old pizza

Yesterday we had pizza for dinner... Again. After dinner I started to put the leftover pizza, box and all, in the refrigerator, when I realized I had no room in there because of two other pizza boxes. (I know- there are several things wrong with this - But stay focused :)

No kidding, for a minute I considered just leaving the new, fresh pizza leftovers on the counter to be thrown away because the old, hard moldy pizza in the fridge was taking up all the room. 

Then it hit me that I was kind of doing the same thing with my thoughts. Over the last few weeks I have had some nasty leftovers of fear, frustration, a little anger, and some sadness filling up my mind. That left little room for good stuff like thankfulness, happiness, fun, and smiles. 

Philippians 4:8 (the Message version) says "Summimg it up friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious - the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse."

I think there's truth in that. So today I'm making a real effort to declutter. I will think good thoughts, and try focussing on what I can do for other people. At least for today :)

And, in case you are wondering, I did take the gross pizza out of the fridge :)

Thursday, August 16, 2012

fear, Joshua, and middle school

Fear. That is what is motivating this blog post. My only child has started middle school and I am not ready. We have everything - it's not that. We bought a backpack, paper, pencils, pens, folders, etc. But I am not emotionally ready. I have dreaded this moment from at least as early as the beginning of 5th grade. I remember tearing up when Noah had his last elementary play, when I had my last few lunches with him, and of course at the 5th grade graduation. With sadness and trepidation, I have shared my worries with his elementary principal, my mother-in-law, my cashier at IHOP - anyone who will listen.

However, time marches on whether we are ready or not. Sunday was the middle school open house. I cried. Twice. Not bad - I expected more tears. Noah showed us around the place and we eagerly checked out the 6th grade hallway where his classes would mostly be.

Sunday night, I stared off into space as I tried to sleep, worry consuming me. What if he hates it? What if he can't find his classes? What if someone says something mean to him? Hurts his feelings? What if he can't find someone to sit beside at lunch? What if he doesn't understand what is being taught? What if he has a mean teacher? What if my sweet boy starts using drugs?

I eventually drifted off, and woke up to the blaring alarm clock. I kept my composure very well. I drove him to school, and parked in the parking lot across the street. I prayed with him on the way there, just as I have done every morning since preschool. He got out and crossed the street, and walked to the door - a seemingly hour-long process. I drove away as he went in the door, and the tears started flowing (mine, not Noah's). I prayed the entire way home, sobbing (talk about distracted driving - thankful I made it home). I cried walking into my house, sitting on my couch. Then I had a deep urge to get my Bible.

I quickly searched for words of comfort, that only God can bring. He delivered.

I remembered something about God's promises to Joshua, so I went there. After thumbing through the book backward (don't know why I always do it this way), I decided I might as well start at chapter 1, and just keep reading until I found comfort. I had plenty of time, but I didn't need it. Turns out, chapter 1 is exactly where God was sending me.

Twice God tells Joshua that He will never leave him. I began to feel my fears ease. God was with Joshua. He was handing over to Joshua the honor/enormous responsibility of leading the Israelites, right after the death of Moses. I wonder what Joshua could have been feeling that day. Maybe honor. That God would trust him to lead His people into the promised land had to be pretty flattering. Clearly there was a little fear; God wouldn't have bothered with all this "Be strong and courageous" business, (which is mentioned 4 times in chapter 1) if it was going to be a cakewalk. (Not exactly sure what a cakewalk is, but I'm assuming it's pretty easy). I think there had to be a little uneasiness as well. Those Israelites could be a whiny bunch. "We miss Egypt! We're tired of manna! Moses has been gone for a few weeks - we need a gold cow ASAP!!"

But, knowing Joshua's heart, God was quick to reassure him. "I will never leave you nor forsake you."

I know these words were spoken specifically for Joshua. But Monday morning, a few minutes before 8 a.m., God let me know that He means them for me too. He loves me and he loves Noah just as much as He loves Joshua. He won't leave Joshua? He won't leave me. He won't leave Noah.

Then came peace. How much more could I need? If I were with Noah all day at middle school, I might be of some comfort (If we can pretend he wasn't humiliated by me being there), but there could be a million things that might come up where I would be of no use. But God - He can do anything. And he will never leave Noah. He will go with him, through homeroom, through social studies, through lunch, through cross country practice.

God also directed Joshua to "Be strong and courageous." Seriously, this was mentioned four times in the 18 verses. I think He meant it. My favorite is verse 9.

      "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

So, it's time to put on my big-girl-panties and be strong. God is with us. What better way to get gain courage?

I'm happy to say that when I picked him up from cross country practice at 4:30 (I was a little early), he told me he had a great day. But then again, how could he not? He had some seriously great company :)

p.s. - a  big 'thank you' to my friends who helped keep me busy, who prayed for me and who checked on me during this. Thanks for understanding my craziness :) Love you all!!


Saturday, August 6, 2011

He restores my soul

My "health" blog has been unintentinally on a bit of a break this summer, as are my healthy efforts, but I miss writing the blog and had some other thoughts I wanted to write about tonight...

Growing up in church and getting most of my education at a Christian school, I feel like I've heard the 23rd Psalm more times than my own name. Not that this is a bad thing, but sometimes we can hear something over and over until it begins to lose meaning. But I love it when something jumps out at you when you least expect it.

I was at a funeral yesterday and Psalm 23 was read. As the speaker was reading... The Lord is my shepherd... He makes me lie down in green pastures... He restores my soul...

He restores my soul.

Dicitonary.com defines restore as "to bring back to a state of health, soundness, or vigor."

I can't count the times I have needed my soul restored. I have felt depleted, I have felt empty, I have felt exhausted, I have felt I'm at the end of my rope. I have felt like a failure, I have felt alone, I have felt broken.

I feel the opposite of someone restored.

Then God finds a perfect way to remind me that I am His. Even if I have screwed up - and believe me, I have. Countless times. He loves on me, reminding me that I am His baby girl, the one He loved more than life. He reminds me that He doesn't love me because I'm perfect and when I'm imperfect it doesn't change His love for me. He just loves me. Period. Nothing I could ever do will make Him love me more and nothing I could ever do could make Him love me less. He just loves me.

And He loves me enough to continue to restore me, over and over.

When God restores, He really restores. And I am thankful.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Stepping it up a notch :)

So, it's been two weeks since my last blog. I posted about how great the Memorial Day 5K went and how I had made a weight-loss goal, yay me, blah blah blah. Well, since then, I have done nothing :(  I haven't exercised even one time and I had several instances of eating things that were bad for me. Consequently, I have put 4 pounds back on. Not surprising. I know I tend to resort to food when I am happy, sad, stressed, etc. I have felt a little bummed and stressed over the last couple of weeks, for various reasons, and easily turned to food, knowing that it wasn't the answer.

But... starting today, I am stepping it up a notch.

After talking about needing to exercise again, the husband wisely commented that I seemed to stick to this whole exercise thing better when I was following the Couch to 5K program (which, if anyone is interested in checking out, and I highly recommend it, can be found at  http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml ). I decided I need a new plan. So... today I began a 10K training program! :)  Yay! If anyone else is interested, it is found here: http://blog.c25kapp.com/about-bridge-to-10k/ . Tonight I did the first run for Week 1 and it felt great! Why did I wait so long?

Oh, and to the left is my most recent pair of goal pants. Super excited about some day fitting into them :)

I ate well today - banana and Nutrigrain bar for breakfast, followed by a grilled chicken sandwich and baked potato for lunch and two Fresco chicken soft tacos and a side of rice from Taco Bell. I even drank water today. That's right, I drank water. I am a serious pop drinker, and while I have been drinking diet pop since the weight loss plan began, I drink a lot of it and no water. So today, I limited myself to only drink pop with my meals, and not putting the Cherry Coke Zero on my desk to sip on throughout the morning. I drank water.

While I am very excited about how today has gone, I am apprehensive to assume the rest of my week will be equally successful. I am hopeful though. Tune in next week and I'll tell you, good or bad :)

Thanks so much for reading! :)

Monday, May 30, 2011

Memorial Day 5K and Outback :)

It's been waaaayyy too long since I last posted anything. I can blame it on a couple of things... I have been really busy (but I was busy when I was posting regularly too, so it's not a good excuse)... and I have a hard time writing a peppy blog when I am crabby, and I had a few crabby days. I also am ashamed to admit it, but I had a couple of bad weigh-ins at home and some not-so-stellar exercise weeks, along with more-than-average bad eating days (hence the bad weigh-ins), and I became uninspired. However, things have picked up and I have made a little progress.

I'm not even sure where to start on pounds gained and lost, so I will go straight for the grand total of weight loss since the beginning of the year... Here it comes.... 35.5 pounds! I'm so excited about this. This was precisely my Memorial Day goal. Some may consider it cheating, but I did wait to weigh myself after I ran today's 5K and then walked in the parade. I was a half of a pound away from the goal, so I promptly stripped the sweat-soaked T-shirt and sports bra off, along with every hair clippy in my head (sorry for the graphic image, haha) Once everything removable was removed, my weight was exactly what I had hoped. I'm counting it :) 

Like a said a minute ago, I ran a 5K today. The Veteran's Memorial Day 5K in Ironton. Shawn, Noah and I ran it together. It was the first one for Shawn and Noah and my third. Because I have already done this before, and Shawn hadn't, I told him I would stay back with Noah and that he should go on. That was clearly not necessary! Noah ditched me after about a mile and a half. I am still amazed. Just last Saturday, Noah practiced with me at his maw-maw's house and we both circled her neighborhood enough times to equal 3.1 miles. He did great, but stayed right with me. A few times I waited on him to catch his breath or tie his shoes, so naturally I assumed he would be slower than me. If we would have bet on this I would think I have been hustled! :)  He was awesome. I can't believe it, but he ran the whole thing in 33:29! Shawn did great as well, finishing at 29 minutes - this after he couldn't even finish it a few nights ago in our neighborhood. My time, while not nearly as impressive as either of theirs, was 36:53! I'm very happy about this!! My goal each race - other than just finishing it alive - is to beat my last time, and so far, that's what I have done. Yay!

Eating out at restaurants and trying to stay healthy is difficult, I have decided. We had a great time this weekend with family from out of town, and had dinner Sunday at Outback. I decided to peruse the menu Saturday night to make sure I knew what healthy item I could order. I am so glad I did! I would have chosen
grilled chicken on the barbie and a house salad, which sounds very healthy. When I calculated the nutritional information on the restaurants website (which is super cool that you can do that), those two little seemingly healthful foods would have had 43.5 grams of fat!

So, I looked at side options and ways to cut some fat grams. Apparently they put butter on EVERYTHING in Australia... or at least at Outback in Barboursville. I do love me some butter. In fact, I remember my mom saying I used to eat butter sandwiches for snacks at my grandmother's house. (Could explain the high cholesterol these days, huh? :)  Anyway, when you take the butter off the chicken, it went from 20 grams of fat to just 8. I ended up ordering the 6 oz. Outback special, no butter, with fresh vegetables, minus butter, and a baked potato with only sour cream and chives on the side. According to the nutrition tool on the website, the entire meal was only 18.6 fat grams. Much better. Oh, and technically, it was fewer than that because I had a lot of sour cream left on the side :) Yay :)

Thanks for reading, and I will hopefully be posting again soon! :)
Jen

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Back on track, 5K, and goal pants :)

Better week :)  I weighed in Monday, losing the pound and a half I had gained the previous week! Yay. I feel a little back on track. My eating habits have been much better this week. I'm pleased. I'm hoping for good results Monday morning :)

My thyroid medicine is a different story. As usual, I finished my month's refill, and forgot to call in a new refill. :(  I will do this though. I will get back in the habit.

Now, for the best news. I ran in another 5K! My second one ever! I was so hoping to beat my last time, but I was concerned I might not, because the last few weeks, my running sessions have dropped dramatically. First I was busy, then didn't feel so great, then I would get these weird head pains that would pop up right when I thought about running... strange, huh? :)  I had lots of excuses, and then finally, I'll admit it, I was just lazy. Even the idea of running was  exhausting. But I haven't given up.

So I went to the 5K with my friend Christy, and I'm so glad I did. I met her in Hurricane bright and early Saturday at 7:30 a.m., and we left from there to go to the state capitol, where there was a ton of people! We lined up at 8:50 and shortly after 9:00, we were off...  It was great! Well, after it was over it was great :) 

The view was great! Right beside the water, and the ground was flat. But it was still hard. I'm not sure why, but I guess I assumed it would be so much easier this time, since I have been running longer than when I tried the last 5K.  I had all sorts of mental excuses as to why I couldn't go faster... too many layers on making me sweaty, not bringing my iPod to have something distracting me, and that super heavy 10-ounce bottle of water that they handed me and I couldn't finish, but couldn't stand to toss on the ground with the hundreds of others. It was like running with a weight. :)

I did okay though. I was concerned about 3/4 of the way through, when I felt a little dizzy... I thought of how embarrassing it would be if I just collapsed on the road, not making it to the finish line. How could I blog about that??! That would have been humiliating. But, thankfully, I didn't. I kept going.

I tried to keep track of my time with my stopwatch feature on my phone, and restricted myself to only looking at it at the halfway point, and then near the end. My halfway time was pretty good, then when I got close to the end, I glanced down and saw that it was something like 26 seconds. I was worried for a minute that I had gone longer than an hour and it might have rolled over... Yikes! But fortunately, I must have pushed the clear button or something.

All in all, I am happy with how I did. I was concerned during the race when I was passed by a sleeping baby. By the time the sixth sleeping baby passed, I was traumatized to the point that I had to laugh about it. I started looking around at the few people still running, and didn't see any numbers on their shirts. So everyone around me were the non-timed runners or walkers. Not a good sign. :)  

Turns out, I finished the race in 38 minutes and 26 seconds!! I even finished before 62 other timed runners! Never mind that I came in 688th place, being beaten by 92 percent of them...  I beat 8 percent of the other timed runners :)  Yay!! (How's that for an optimistic glass of 8 percent full? :) 

Seriously, though, I was really proud of myself and it totally made my day. I think it inspired me to run more. I even ran tonight after church. I'm sore, but it's worth it :)

On a side note, I have picked out new goal pants!! I went through the archives, i.e., bottom drawer, and chose a pair of black pants that I hope to be in, comfortably, eventually :)

I also set a new, short-term goal, of losing 6 1/2 pounds by Memorial Day. We'll see if it happens. Not a big deal if it doesn't, but it would be great :)

Thanks so much for reading! I weigh in again tomorrow. Wish me luck!! :)

Jen